What My Evil Twin Was Thinking

It wasn't the hooker-tight skirt or the tube top, both three sizes too small for you that I noticed first. Nor was it the recent post-pregnancy belly that hung like a fifth appendage that neither article of clothing could hide. And it wasn't the ankle-high Uggs you were wearing on this 80+ degree, humid day.

Nope, the first thing I noticed about your classy self as you were standing at the bus stop was the big wad of chew you spit into the street as I drove by.

Trash isn't limited to trailer parks in rural areas. We have them right here, too, in the over-populated Northeast. You find them everywhere, but you see them mostly in Wal*Mart and local convenience stores.

I wonder what you thought as you dressed yourself this morning. I bet you thought you looked good. Do you have anyone to tell you otherwise? What were you up to? Where were you going as you waited for the bus? You know what? I really don't care.  You simply offered me comic relief as I drove to my destination, with you mismatched ensemble clearly designed to titillate and draw attention.

You gave my mean, little mind something to distract me from the constant barrage of crap I have to deal with on a daily basis.