End of Summer Haikus

Hot and disgusting
Summer air; heavy, humid
Autumn please come soon

The bright sun beats down
Turning my skin to leather
Melanoma, ick!


Knit sweater weather,
Woolen,s and tights under skirts
A chill in the air


I want snow and cold
I want crunchy orange leaves
I want Halloween

What do I want to be when I grow up?

When I was little, I wanted to be a princess like Cinderella. She was my favorite. We weren't inundated with Disney princesses the way we are now. I believe Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty were it. We didn't yet have the mermaid or the thing with the genie, and there were definitely no talking snowmen.

It didn't take me long to understand that "princess" is not a viable job description, so I moved on to something more practical. I used to think I wanted to be a reporter, and I actually tried that. It was never really fun, but sometimes interesting work. At least I wrote on a regular basis, AND GOT PAID for the effort. But the money was shit, and so I moved on.

I've been a mall Easter Bunny. I've cleaned toilets in a public restroom. I've slung chicken for fast food. I've sold retail and I've gutted lobster in the basement kitchen of an expensive East Village restaurant. I still haven't been able to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I don't know what I can do for the long run that will pay me and not make me unhappy.

I think that actually being happy at a job is almost too much to ask for, let alone hope for. I think that right now I know exactly one person who loves what she does for a living. But she's still new at her job. Her feelings could change at any time.

I would absolutely love to work at a job that I don't hate. 

Too Much Spare Time

I am currently unemployed. The choice wasn't mine; my corporate masters decided for me. But it's OK. I hadn't actually taken a vacation of any note in more than two years. I was overdue for a break. And so far, I'm not unhappy. Of course I'm not being as productive as I would like to be, but to be honest, it's taken some time for me to get my head around this having nothing concrete to do everyday thing.

I imagine running a multi-national corporation isn't easy, and I know that my corporate masters had faced some pretty big hurdles. It really must be hard to maintain those multi-million dollar bonuses, and educational publishing in the U.S. has been slipping these past few years. Schools simply don't have the money to buy books. But let's face it. They never really have. How many of us had 20+ year-old books in school? So what if the Soviet Union and countries like Yugoslavia no longer exist? The books still give the proper shape of the European continent, right? Who cares where East Timor and South Sudan are anyway?

But to get back on track, I was laid off over the phone. This is proof about how morally bankrupt some people truly have become. I was called on my work-at-home day and told that after 16 years my services were no longer needed. Of course they wanted me to come in to finish up any outstanding tasks, to clean off my desk, and to turn in my laptop (I will miss my Mac Book). And though my last day on the books was a month away, I was at least given the flexibility to decide when I would be finished, done, and outta there. My treatment was decidedly more generous than other people received that same day.

I'm not actually complaining, even though it may sound like it. I had begun a job search on my own because it had become apparent to me that my corporate masters and I had different ideas about how editing and writing should be done. I personally favor a hands-on approach, whereas my former masters prefer to outsource the work. Administration and paper-pushing is not what I signed up for, hence my discontent.

So, here I am, cut adrift as it were. I am lucky enough to have a severance package that will keep me out of the unemployment office for a few months. I have spent a couple of days at the beach. I have gone camping. I have mostly spent my time decompressing. But I still wake up every morning by 6. I have yet to decide if that's good or bad.